“A good friend is a connection to life—a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world.” —Lois Wyse
At Be Active Be Well, we discuss loneliness often because it is a constant threat to the physical and mental health of older adults. There is a common phenomenon constantly occurring around us: Old age robbing aging adults of relational connections. One by one we lose siblings, neighbors, close friends, and acquaintances to old age related death and infirmity. We ourselves can become isolated and lonely due to illness or injury. It is the natural, and sometimes unnatural, course of life. Loneliness and isolation can lead to a multitude of health issues, premature death and decreased quality of life for those of us still living.
Growing older has enough challenges on its own to threaten friendships. Today, add in the isolation of a global pandemic, colder fall weather and cold & flu season and you’ll have more than enough reasons to not connect with other humans. However, isolation is simply not a healthy or sustainable way to live. Research has proven time and time again that loneliness accelerates aging, worsens depression and anxiety, and can suppress immune function, just to name a few of the potential risks.
Loneliness can occur even when you live with someone or have people around you regularly. Consider the often poeticized “lonely in a crowd” concept. The point is that as humans, we don’t just need companionship. We need a variety of meaningful friendships and social connections in order to live our best, thriving life. We need the passing “Hello” of the occasionally seen neighbor just as much as we need the soul-connections of deep friendships.
If you are experiencing loneliness for any reason, you are not alone. The National Academies of Sciences, Engineering and Medicine found that over a third of adults aged 45 and older feel lonely, and nearly a fourth of adults aged 65 and older are socially isolated, which can also lead to loneliness. You can always talk to your doctor and the people around you. You can also consider developing practical habits to fight off the loneliness and bring meaningful social connections into your life. We have a few suggestions for you:
-
- Go for a walk: Around your neighborhood or at your local park; Be friendly and seek opportunities to say hello or chat with neighbors. One of the easiest ways to meet people in close proximity to you is to go outside and look for opportunities to talk to them.
- Spend time: We often take the people already in our life for granted. Talk to your existing friends, caregivers, spouse, children, grandchildren, siblings, etc. Ask them to share a meal or activity with you. If you have people around you, take advantage of the opportunity for meaningful connection.
- Be friendly: Remember that most human interactions can become meaningful just by saying “Hello” or smiling at a passing human. For me, when someone smiles back at me as we pass each other, just that simple acknowledgement can significantly boost my mood. These days, if I’m masked up, I make it a point to say “Hello” as I pass, since they can’t see my smile.
- Join a group: Consider finding a local club, organization, church or online group. Shared interests are great ways to form connections. If you are nervous to meet in person, many organizations have virtual meetup options. Senior Planet is also a option for free online classes and discussions.
- Use technology: If you can’t connect face to face with others, video calling is a great option. Iphones have the Facetime option that allows you to easily video chat with other iphone users. Most android phones have some sort of video calling feature. Other great free apps include facebook messenger, skype and zoom.
- Write letters: Not the most trendy communication form, but letter writing is a great way to practice fine motor skills, gather your thoughts and ideas before sharing them, and stay connected with others. You can write letters to anyone you already know, or find a pen pal.
DISCLAIMER: This article contains information that is intended to help the readers be better informed regarding exercise and health care. It is presented as general advice on health care. Always consult your doctor for your individual needs. Before beginning any new exercise program it is recommended that you seek medical advice from your personal physician. This article is not intended to be a substitute for the medical advice of a licensed physician. The reader should consult with their doctor in any matters relating to his/her health.
